Bitter Sweet

This is my daughter, Grace. And with her is Doe, my aunt and uncle's lab and Grace's new biggest fan.

On Memorial Day, after my run and a fun time at the zoo, we went to my aunt and uncle's for dinner. My aunt and uncle have about 46 dogs. OK, that's a gross exaggeration, obviously. But they never have fewer than 3. (I come from a long line of "animal people.") The other dogs were pretty indifferent to Grace. Doe, though, clearly, truly, genuinely had an obvious affinity for her. Doe followed Grace all over the house. At one point, they were even swapping and sharing their toys. 

Watching Grace and Doe together was poignant, in the truest sense of the word.  Sweet, for certain. But also bitter. Two months and three days prior, we lost Huan. And Grace was very much still a baby. But now she crawls, babbles, engages in meaningful ways, imitates, shows a sense of humor. She very much became a kid. I anticipated missing the opportunity to watch her relationship with Huan blossom as she matured. (See very first blog entry.) I just didn't realize I would literally miss it by such a narrow margin. Two months. Ouch. If only...

David and I have been struggling with this one ever since Memorial Day. Grace needs a dog. I just wish it could have been Huan. He would have loved her up but would have always respected her space and the boundaries we imposed--like, for example, not entering her room without invitation, a rule, incidentally, that he did observe since we brought her home from the hospital. He would have never, ever begged for her food, let alone taken it. Of course she would have offered it, and of course he would have barely grazed her fingers with his teeth as he took it. She would have toppled all over his ginormous body and tugged on his ears and stuck her hands in his food bowl and taken his bones, and he would have let her. He would have learned the command "Baby kiss," just as he knew "Mama kiss," and he would have happily obliged. He would have protected her. He would have been her best pal. They would have made some duo, my baby and my Bubba. I can't imagine anything sweeter, and I know that, someday, I won't feel so bitter about that. And maybe that will be the day Grace gets her dog.